Chrysalis' Transgender Questions Answered (Year 2001)

Transgender Guide | Site Map | Chat | Personals | Message Board | Articles | Support | Shopping | Links

About The Transgender Guide at

A common thread throughout the community is looking for answers to the multitude of questions that plague us and bedevil our lives. While nobody has all the answers, sometimes we do have insights. Since the very best answers are those we find for ourselves, this is not strictly an advice column. Nor are we by any means experts or certified professionals. What we are, are people like yourself. We've searched for answers, and occasionally found some. Our goal here is to share our insights with you, to perhaps show you a perspective that you may not have seen, and thereby gain your own answer. Since many questions tend to follow common threads amongst the transgender community, we will address those questions first. If you have a question you are seeking answers to, by all means contact us. While we may not be able to respond directly to every inquiry, we will whenever possible attempt to help in any way we can. PLEASE send any questions you may have from the serious to the frivolous, transgender related or not to: Q&A Your questions are what will make this column worthwhile.

NOTE: I am not qualified, nor do I have the resources to answer medically specific questions. Nor is this the source to look for charting YOUR medical and treatment needs. Those questions are best dealt with by working together with your Doctors and Therapist. This is an ADVICE column. The answers are only my opinion, based on my own experience and the best information available to me.


Identities will be kept CONFIDENTIAL . Address your questions to


In Memoriam: Connie Ann 'Chrysalis' Spry

1947 - 2005

Connie, known as Chrysalis, originally posted these pages on her "Another Waye" website and contributed generously to  After fiercely battling persistent illnesses, she passed away peacefully in her sleep on May 25, 2005.   She served two tours in the Vietnam War in the Marine Corps.   She was an active leader of her local church, an uncompromising advocate for GLBT rights, and the epitome of unconditional love.  She was mother, friend and sister to many, and will be missed very much."


Question:   My name is Amber and I am doing a little research for a friend that does not have access to the internet. He is looking for information for personal use and also for the job that he is currently employed in.
My main question to you is the costs that are involved and also the benefits that may be entitled from being a member of private health Insurance. It is a very grey area, particularly when you contact the funds directly as it is not a talked about subject. Also classifications that are made as to whether it is 'medically necessary' operation or not.  Any additional information that you may have on the topic would be greatly appreciated, also any other people that you would know of that we could get in contact with to discuss the issue. Lastly I would like to thank you for telling your story over the web page, hopefully the information that I can get from yourself and other sourses will be greatly appreciated and helpful to my good friend. I guess both of us being gay males around the age of 22, I was having a little trouble understanding exactly what he was going through and why he would want to change himself, but after many late night discussions and lots of reading, I now understand that it is not a choice or a decision, it is just meant to be. I am looking forward to your reply, and once again thank you for the information that you have shared on the website.. Kind Regards

Question:  I am an 18 F2M. I am just starting out with therapy, and have been living as a male for a year. I am starting college this year as a male, in the male dorms, the whole nine yards. I have a great therapist, good friends and a wonderfully supportive girlfriend...but i am worried about the financial strain of transitioning. Hormones are my first step and hopefully that will be within 3 to 4 months. I have no idea how much they cost. Can you give me an estimate? I have to pay for college, and my parents are not too willing to shell out the money for surgeries and/or hormones. But I need them. I have had 18 years of HECK! I am not going to wait much longer.

Question:  Hey, I have a question for you. I am 24, like a bunch of other people who asked you questions. I took herbal hormones for about 9 months, then I started using estradiol without the supervision of a doctor for over a month. I realized that it was dangerous and I should seek a doctor. I think I have found a good therapist to see that can also refer me to an endo doc. My problem is though, I am scared to go see the therapist. I know I am transsexual, but I am scared to do anything about it. It tears me up inside and I try to deny it everyday, but I really can't anymore. I really know who I am, I am worried about doing what my heart really thinks I should. I don't know why. I go to bed at night scared of being so masculine, and 5'11 150lbs.. knowing I could easily see a therapist and get anti-androgens and estrogen prescribed to me legally to stop anything else from happening. I don't know why I won't go to see the therapist I have found though. I really want to, I just cant find the courage to do it yet. I don't know how to handle the pressure in my mind, otherwise I would go tomorrow. I don't know what to do!!!

Question:  Hi Chrysalis, I have been crossdressing since I was 10 years old but always been kept in the closet. I have recently decided I wanted to experience my feminine side more often. I live in Florida with my family. We have been together for xx years I love my wife but she will accept my dressing up as long it is not in front of her she does let me wear nightgowns and panties. I understand why she is afraid neighbors will find out about me. My question is is there any support groups that I can talk to who will understand me I am 47 years old now and I know my feminism will never go away my son also knows I dress up and he has asked why of course but he understands now and said 'it was ok with him. I also have my mother living with us and she knows I wear nightgowns to bed every night but she doesn't know about my dressing up and I want her to accept me as another daughter she has two now my sisters. both my sisters know about me my oldest disapproves but younger sister thinks its ok since she is the one that knew what I did all these years she helped me by giving me some of her clothes and underwear we also played together when we could be alone I played with her dolls a lot she also gave me my name. I hope you will respond to my e-mail and give me some suggestions thank you.

Question:  I was wondering in you would be willing to talk to me about going through the change. I'm 24 and on hormones for about 2 months. I'm having a hard time deciding who to choose for the procedure my Doctor got me info from Menard in Canada. My Doctor only knows so much so if you would be willing to help me that would be great!

Question:  Hi my name is Alex and I was wondering if you would be willing to talk to me about going through the change. I'm 24 and on hormones for about 2 months. I'm having a hard time deciding who to choose for the procedure my Dr. got me info from Menard in Canada. My Dr. only knows so much so if you would be willing to help me that would be great! Thanks,

Question:  I am having trouble labeling myself and also wondering if I should. what I do know is that I was born male, I am 24 years old and that I am bisexual and a cross-dresser. I always assumed that I was a transvestite, but then I started reading books on the subject, which gave descriptions of what it was to be transgendered, transvestite, transsexual, and drag queens. what I found out from reading those is that I am not seemingly any of those, but I seem to have some aspects of a few different ones all jumbled together. I'd like to know your opinion on that (or if you think that I shouldn't label myself, but just go with it.) and also I have been trying to come out recently, parts have been ok but others have been hard, my family doesn't know yet, but a few of my friends do. How did you go about dealing with you family

Chrysalis Q & A Home | 1999 Q & A | 2000 Q & A | 2001 Q & A | Links


Copyright 1996 - by All Rights Reserved. Disclaimer

Email us at: